Self Knowledge Questionnaires – No 6 Obstacles to Love

Self Knowledge Questionnaires – No 6 Obstacles to Love

Self Knowledge Exercises 
K06 – OBSTACLES TO LOVE OTHERS
In which situations do you loose you sense of love and unity. You may feel any of the following emotions: fear, negativity, alienation, discomfort, aversion, worry, anxiety, anger, hate, reservation, bitterness, jealousy, resentment, disillusionment, frustration, rejection towards the other or towards your self, inferiority, superiority, or any other type of emotional distancing from that person. After each situation note down some of the emotions which you might feel in that situation.

1. When others are different, or from another group or some specific grouping.

a. Strange dress______________________________________________

b. Other political party _________________________________________

c. Other religion______________________________________________

d. Other social – economic group _________________________________

e. Other educational or mental level _____________________________

f. Other country______________________________________________

g. Other race______________________________________________

2. When the other do not agree with me. When they believe and express different opinions, or reject mine. ___________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

3. When they criticize me or persons or groups important to me.

_______________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

4. When others obstruct me or persons important to me from fulfilling important needs ie. Food, shelter, sex, work, sleep, money, vacations, meditation, the other’s approval and esteem.

_______________________________________________________________________

5. When my energy is low or I am not feeling well.

_______________________________________________________________________

6. When others harm me or important others physically, or hurt us emotionally___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

7. When I have personal problems which occupy much of my energy and mental resources. _______________________________________________________________________

8. When others do not live up to my expectations or do not function as we would like them to. ( especially children, spouses, siblings and parents.)_______________________________________________________________

9. When I do not love and accept myself._________________________________

10. When I feel guilt or fear_____________________________________________

Analysis and active listening concerning our obstacles towards loving others

Try to answer as honestly as possible

1. In which situations (in the face of which type of behaviors, or character types) do you lose your feelings of love unity or harmony with the others?

 

 

 

 

 

2. What emotions do you usually feel in those situations?

 

 

 

 

 

3. What do you believe :

A. About the other’s behavior or attitude?

 

 

B. About the other?

 

 

C. About your self (your safety, self worth etc.) In such situations?

 

 

 

4. How could you manage to sustain your feelings of unity and love in future even in such situations, or in the face of the same behavior or character types?

 

 

 

 

5. What would you like to communicate to such a person, or in such a situation?


SELF KNOWLEDGE EXERCISES

There are a variety of techniques that we can use in order to become more aware of both our personality and our greater spiritual Self. Only a few of these can be shared in written format as they require personal guidance from an experienced teacher. All of the information presented here in this web site has the purpose of increasing your self-knowledge on all levels, especially the Self Clarification Process.
Self-Knowledge Questionnaires for the purpose of understanding your personality and its functioning more deeply.
Answering the questions presented in the following questionnaires will deepen your understanding of your self.

You can find these questions in an ebook download at

https://www.armonikizoi.com/store/products/life-coach-7-working-with-emotions

Some of the subjects covered are the following:

K_01 Something HappyAnalyze something which makes you happy.

K_02 Something Which Bothers Analyze Something Which Bothers You. Understand The Feelings And The Beliefs.

K_03 Why Love Self – Discover As Many Reasons As Possible To Love, Respect And Accept Your Self

K_04 Why Love Other Discover As Many Reasons As Possible To Love, Respect And Accept Someone

K_05 Active Listening Questions – Analyze The Mechanism Through Which Your Emotions Are Created

K_06 Obstacles To Love Others Discover Your Obstacles Towards Loving Others

K_07 Analysis Loving Selves Discover Your Obstacles Towards Loving Your Self

K_08 Understand Anxiety & Worry – Discover Why You Feel Anxiety, And Worry

K_09 Understand Hurt & Pain Understand The Mechanism Of Pain And Suffering

K_10 Understand Disappointment – Realize How You Create Disappointment

K_11 Understand Depression – Understand The Mechanism Of Depression

K_12 Understanding Jealousy – Analyze Why You Feel Jealousy Or Envy

K_13 Understand Loneliness – Discover How We Create Loneliness

K_14 Understand Self Doubt – Uncover The Roots Of Self-Doubt

K_15 Understand Anger – Realize How You Create Anger

K_16 Understand Blaming – Discover Why You Tend To Criticize And Blame

K_17 Analyzing Our Conscience – Discover Where You Conscience Is Bothering, And Why You Continue With Behaviors Which Are Not In Harmony With Your Conscience

K_19 Locate Emotions – Discover Where Your Emotions Store Themselves In Your Body

K_20 Relationship Questions – A List Of Questions For Couples To Answer, So As To Get To Know Each Other More Deeply

K_21 Life’s Lessons – Discover What You Have Learn From The Others’ Behavior Which Bother You

K_22 Inner Guidance – Investigate Possible Parts Of Your Self Which Do Not Want To Get Well, Or Make Changes For The Better.

K_23 Obstacle To Getting Well – Investigate Possible Parts Of Your Self Which Do Not Want To Get Well, Or Make Changes For The Better

K_24 My Relationship With God – Research Your Relationship With The Divine. How Do You Relate To God And Universe

K_25 Obstacles To Fulfillment – Discover Possible Obstacles Towards Fulfilling Your Life Goals

K_26 Obstacles To Growth – Understand Those Inner Obstacles To Your Spiritual Growth Process

K_27 Three Love Letters – Write A Love Letter To Someone You Love, Someone You Have Difficulty With And Your Own Self

K_28 Shadow + Mask – Analyze What You Hide In Your Shadow (Subconscious) And Place In Your Mask (How You Want To Appear) And Whether Or Not You Want To Make Any Changes

K_29 Freeing Selves From Mirror- Discover What You Might Be Doing Which Might Be Attracting From Others Behaviors Which Bother You

K_30 Sorting Feelings – Distinguish Between Your Feelings And How They Store In Your Body

K_31 Understanding Emotions – Analyze The Emotions You Do And Do Not Feel Comfortable With.

K_32 12 Steps Towards Conscious Love A Detailed Questionnaire Concerning How We Relate To Love Partners

K_33 Bioenergy Level – Discover How What You Do Affects Your Energy Level

K_34 Categories Of Beliefs – Put Order To Your Various Beliefs

K_35 Dream Analysis – Make Your Own Personal Interpretation Of Your Dreams

K_36 Contract With Self – Make A Contract With Your Self Concerning Goals And Decisions

K_37 The Three Gunas – Analyze The Nature Of Your Body And Mind

K_38 Active Listening Towards Someone – Make A List Of Questions, Which You Would Like To Ask Someone You Would Like To Understand More Deeply

K_39 Purifying Character – A List Of Questions Concerning How We Would Like To Have Cultivated Our Character Before We Leave Our Bodies.

K_40 Forgiveness- Who We Would Like To Forgive And Also To Ask Forgiveness From And For What

K_41 Leaving The Body – What Will You Miss When You Leave Your Physical Body

K_42 Life Goals – What Are The Goals Which We Would Like To Accomplish Before Leaving Our Physical Bodies?

K_43 Mirroring Possibilities – Discover What Aspects Of Your Self Might Be Reflecting Back To You From Others

K_44 Facing Death Of Loved Ones – Questions Concerning How We Feel About The Possible Departure Of Loved Ones

K_45 What To Actualize? – List What You Would Like To Actualize In Your Life.

K_46 Being Ready For Departure – How To Be Ready For Our Departure From The Physical Body Whenever That Might Occur

K_47 How You Want Things To End – Realize How You Would Like The Various Aspects Of Your Life To Unfold

K_48 Liberation From Childhood – A Detailed Analysis Of How We Can Discover The Programming Of Our Childhood Years

K_49 Positive For Roles – Find The Beliefs Which Will Aid You In Getting Free From Being Affected By People Playing The Roles Of Intimidator, Interrogator, Victim And Aloof

K_50 Making A Program For Change – A Detailed Guide For Making Specific Decisions For Self-Improvement

Questionnaire – About Solving Problems

Questionnaire – About Solving Problems

QUESTIONS CONCERNING YOUR PRESENT GOAL OF SOLVING PROBLEMS OR CREATING SOMETHING
1. THE ISSUE

The problem I want to solve or what I want to create is:

2. MY NEEDS

My needs and motivation here are the following. I want to solve this problem or create the above mentioned because:

3. I AM LIMITED BY THE FOLLOWING EXTERNAL FACTORS

4. I AM LIMITED BY THE FOLLOWING INNER BLOCKAGES

5. MY TIME LIMIT FOR SOLVING THIS PROBLEM IS

6. THE OPTIONS WHICH I HAVE THOUGH OF UNTIL NOW ARE

Option A

A1:The positive aspects of this option are:

A2: The negative aspects of this option are:

A3: I feel the following emotions about this option:

Option B

B1:The positive aspects of this option are:

B2: The negative aspects of this option are:

B3: I feel the following emotions about this option:

Option C

C1:The positive aspects of this option are:

C2: The negative aspects of this option are:

C3: I feel the following emotions about this option:

Option D

D1:The positive aspects of this option are:

D2: The negative aspects of this option are:

D3: I feel the following emotions about this option:

Option E

E1:The positive aspects of this option are:

E2: The negative aspects of this option are:

E3: I feel the following emotions about this option:

LETTING GO OF RESENTMENT

LETTING GO OF RESENTMENT

You can download a small ebook with many relaxation proceedures

at https://www.armonikizoi.com/store/products/life-coach-8-guided-relaxation-procedures

With the following content.

  1. An Introduction To Relaxation Techniques
  2. Positive Visualization Technique for Self Therapy and Prevention of Illness
  3. Techniques for Re-balancing Our Energy
  4.  A Deep Relaxation for Self Acceptance
  5.  A Deep Relaxation Technique for Transforming Childhood Experiences
  6.  Loving The Child That You Were
  7.  Letting Go Of Resentment
  8.  Entertaining The Opposite Emotion
  9.  Letting An Emotion Take A Form And Transforming It
  10.  Letting Our Pains, Illnesses Or Problems Take A Form
  11.  Recognizing And Manifesting Talents, Abilities And Qualities
  12.  A Visit To The Sun
  13.  Music Relaxation
  14.  Color Relaxation
  15.  Becoming The Light – Contact With God
  16.  Circle Of Love
  17.  Disidentifying With Our Bodies And Identifying With Our Souls
  18.  A  Meeting With Your Spiritual Guide
  19.  Finding Out Our Purpose In Life
  20.  Harmonizing The Energy  Centers & Other Possibilities

*****************

Also you can order CDs with guided relaxation techniques at

https://www.armonikizoi.com/store/products/category/en_store_audio_cd_other

*****************

And you can download various guided relaxation proceedures from

https://www.armonikizoi.com/downloads?category=4

************

 

Such inner relaxation techniques must never be performed when you are driving or operating any machinery. You should be alone in a secure and safe place where you can let go and have no responsibilities to attend to for at least 15 minutes after completing the relaxation. Unless you are already familiar with are practicing such, do not exceed 20 minutes. If you have any difficulties, discontinue temporarily and until you receive guidance from a guide experienced in such techniques, or if you are a member, send us an email (Please include your user name and password).

LETTING GO OF RESENTMENT

Feelings of resentment, which sometimes lead to disillusionment, anger and even hate, have a very powerful affect on our nervous and endocrine system, and eventually on our immune system. When such feelings also lead to feelings of weakness, helplessness and hopelessness, then our defense system is more seriously weakened. It has been shown in many scientific studies that the defense system is frequently weakened after the unexpected loss of something very important to us, such as a loved one, a job, a home, our social status or anything else which is very important to us and whose loss we cannot accept. In a number of these cases cancer or some other result of immune weakness is developed.

It is also believed that resentment when long standing in a body can be transferred into physical terms as arthritic or rheumatic problems. This transferal of specific emotions into physical phenomena is an extremely interesting field which will gain much more attention in coming years as science will be forced to investigate it. Until now it is known and accepted mostly to those who work on the spiritual level.

The following visualizations can help us to release such negative emotions which are without doubt affecting in some way our state of health and our harmony with our selves and others. We would all do well to get free from such emotions, for in the last analysis, why should we continue to harm ourselves, because someone performed some injustice to us in the past. When we hold on to resentment or anger or hate towards that person, we only harm ourselves more. Those feelings exist in our body; they affect our liver, our kidneys, our heart, our blood vessels, not the other’s. They inhibit our feelings of happiness, not his. They limit our reality, not his. We are only harming ourselves with these feelings. When we are hurt by some event of life, such as the loss of a loved one or something else very important to us, what do we gain by holding on to the past, but concentrating with bitterness on the injustice of life? Does life suffer or do we suffer?

We cannot change those events of the past. But we can change our attitude towards them. If there is something which we can do in the present to better the quality of our lives, let us do it. But let us let go of the negative feelings which are created by our insistence that life be the way we want it to be. Let us let go of the idea that if things are not the way we have been programmed to believe that they must be, then we cannot be happy. We can be happy if we want to. It is up to us and this technique will help us. As Ken Keyes says, “When you worry about what you do not have, you loose what you do have”. Let us start to look at what we do have, I am sure we will see that it is quite wonderful, if we can let go of the past and see the present as it really is. This is an essential part of our self therapy and self-transformation process.

a. After creating a state of deep relaxation, bring to your mind one by one the various negative feelings which you have been having about specific events or problems in your life. If you are holding negative feelings towards anyone, then bring that person to your mind and experience those feelings. Imagine your self expressing to the other how you are feeling. Explain to him or her why you are feeling that way, how you have been hurt, disappointed. Explain how you didn’t expect what happened, and how you would really have liked things to have happened differently. Express your self in your mind as clearly as you can, not only your anger, but also your feelings of hurt and vulnerability.

b. Once you have mentally expressed your feelings, then realize that these persons have acted out of weakness, out of fear and ignorance. There is no reason to condemn them. They have made a mistake. We too make mistakes. FORGIVE them and let go of your negative feelings. Forgive them and create if possible positive feelings towards them. Realize that they, like you, are in a process of evolution. They cannot be perfect. They will make mistakes.

c. Realize that you too are a soul in the process of evolution and that in truth, nothing can really harm you. You are indestructible and self-sufficient. Feel strong, big, safe and secure and forgive the other, realizing that your happiness and security cannot really depend on someone else.

d. Realize too that there is a universal law of cause and effect and that nothing could ever happen to you if you did not deserve it, if it was not useful for your evolutionary process. Thus realizing that, in fact, no one has ever done you an injustice. For some reason, it had to happen in that way regardless if you are able to understand why. That does not mean that we let people do what they want. We express to them our displeasure or in some cases we protect ourselves, even through court cases, but we let go of negative feelings. We can correct the other’s actions and protect ourselves from them without having negative feelings towards them; negative feelings which harm us more than them.

e. Thus while we are in the relaxation, we can imagine ourselves forgiving the other and accepting him. We can imagine that we are at good terms with each other. If you feel ready, you can even imagine that you are embracing, making up and experiencing love and harmony between you. If this is difficult, you can at least wish them to be healthy and happy in their lives. Do this for all the people in your family (independent as to whether you feel that you have serious problems with them). Do this with relatives, especially with parents and with coworkers or anyone else who has been close to you and has had the opportunity to hurt you, or disappoint you.

f. In this way, forgive each important person in your life for everything. Work on each person and each event separately and specifically. When you have difficulty forgiving a specific person, work on him or her in your relaxation on a daily basis until you overcome your inner resistance. This will do wonders for your own health and vitality. If your resentment is towards life or towards God, then do the same technique imagining life or God in some way and working in the same way. If you are feeling weak and helpless in a difficult world as a result of these difficulties which you have passed through, work on the technique for SELF CONFIDENCE or the technique of CONTACT WITH GOD. Doing this daily will free us from negative emotions concerning ourselves and others. If these emotions are intense, it would be better to seek out professional help in this process.

01 AN INTRODUCTION TO RELAXATION TECHNIQUES

01 AN INTRODUCTION TO RELAXATION TECHNIQUES

You can download a small ebook with many relaxation proceedures

at https://www.armonikizoi.com/store/products/life-coach-8-guided-relaxation-procedures

With the following content.

  1. An Introduction To Relaxation Techniques
  2. Positive Visualization Technique for Self Therapy and Prevention of Illness
  3. Techniques for Re-balancing Our Energy
  4.  A Deep Relaxation for Self Acceptance
  5.  A Deep Relaxation Technique for Transforming Childhood Experiences
  6.  Loving The Child That You Were
  7.  Letting Go Of Resentment
  8.  Entertaining The Opposite Emotion
  9.  Letting An Emotion Take A Form And Transforming It
  10.  Letting Our Pains, Illnesses Or Problems Take A Form
  11.  Recognizing And Manifesting Talents, Abilities And Qualities
  12.  A Visit To The Sun
  13.  Music Relaxation
  14.  Color Relaxation
  15.  Becoming The Light – Contact With God
  16.  Circle Of Love
  17.  Disidentifying With Our Bodies And Identifying With Our Souls
  18.  A  Meeting With Your Spiritual Guide
  19.  Finding Out Our Purpose In Life
  20.  Harmonizing The Energy  Centers & Other Possibilities

*****************

Also you can order CDs with guided relaxation techniques at

https://www.armonikizoi.com/store/products/category/en_store_audio_cd_other

*****************

And you can download various guided relaxation proceedures from

https://www.armonikizoi.com/downloads?category=4

************

An introduction to Relaxation Techniques

************

Of all the techniques that I have suggested that people use over the years for self-therapy, deep relaxation with positive imagery is the one, which I have suggested most often. It is what absolutely everyone needs independent of whether they have physical of emotional problems or not. We all have much to benefit by stopping at least once a day and lying down on our backs (or on our abdomen or sitting straight in a chair) and relaxing consciously all the parts of our body and then our minds. This simple technique allows the basic healing energies of the body to work at restoring the proper harmony which is required for healthy and effective functioning of the body and mind.

The blood vessels relax and there is increased blood flow to parts of the body where tension was restricting flow. The lactic acid build up which causes tiredness, is allowed to be transformed and removed. All the systems of the body begin a process of harmonizing themselves through various mechanisms. The nervous system is relaxed and rejuvenated and prepared for more efficient functioning. The mind is cleared, emptied and enabled to think much more clearly, intelligently and positively. In deep relaxation, as you will learn in detail below, we are able to direct our body’s healing energies mentally to the areas which we would like to affect more specifically. Thus if we are having a problem with our liver, we can send healing energy there by imagining light, or peace, or positive healthful feelings and thoughts flowing into the liver. This can be done with any part of the body. The same technique of positive thinking can be used with all aspects of our lives.

We can imagine ourselves with greater self acceptance, self confidence, self love, with greater peace of mind, greater ease and confidence in our social and professional contacts. We can imaging ourselves in harmonious and loving relationships. We can imagine ourselves healthy, full of energy and happiness. This is not self deception. It is the directing of the mind’s energies towards the eventual creation of exactly these positive realities.

Our thoughts, feelings and beliefs are the creators of our lives, of our illness and our health, of our failures and successes, of our happiness and unhappiness. Changing our thoughts eventually leads to changes in our lives, including in our health.

Below you will find a variety of various relaxation techniques which you can employ in order to restore or maintain your health and harmony. You can then decide which of the techniques seem to appeal most to you.


If you should like to create a deep relaxation technique for your self you should include:

1. The method of relaxing which helps you to relax most easily.


2. Projection of healing energy to parts of the body which you would like to heal.


3. Projection of positive thoughts and images concerning your personality and your contact with the world around you. Imagine yourself as you would like to be.


4. Be sure to always create feelings of self acceptance, self love and self confidence. These are very important in self healing.


5. Leave time for your mind to just be empty and let whatever changes need to take place in your body or mind to happen without your mental intervention. This time of emptiness is essential both in self healing and also in our spiritual growth process.

In employing your relaxation pay attention to the following:

1. You should be appropriately covered in case your body metabolism falls and you feel cold.


2. It is best to be alone in the room unless the other is sleeping, or aware of what you are doing and capable of being extremely quiet. But if these conditions are not available, then I would say to go ahead and try to do deep relaxation anyway. You would be amazed by how much you can go within yourself and become unaware of what is going on around you.


3. Leave time to really «wake up»; and gradually move into activity. Do not come out of the relaxation just moments before you have to do something or be somewhere. Five minutes transition time is probably enough for most people.


4. If you suffer from low blood pressure and find that you are dizzy or very cold after deep relaxation, then try doing your relaxation with your legs on a pillow or on the wall. In these positions you will ensure an abundant flow of blood to the brain and you will not feel dizzy or weak afterwards.


5. Do not over do relaxation. Twenty to thirty minutes twice or three times a day are enough in the beginning. Do not do more than this without the guidance of someone experienced in these techniques. Yoga teachers can help you and a growing number of psychologists are learning and using such techniques with their patients.

6. The techniques are best done on an empty stomach but can be done after meals if there is absolutely no other time. The best time to do them is after one of your exercise and breathing sessions. Another suitable time is in the afternoon or early evening, especially after work in order to rejuvenate your body for the evening activities. If none of these times are suitable, then at least do it before falling asleep in the evening. Some people who have trouble sleeping use it in the middle of the night in order to sleep, and others who wake up early use these techniques to start their days with a fresh and positive outlook. Experiment and find out what is best for you.


7. The purpose is not to fall asleep. But if you are tired and fall asleep do not worry. You have relaxed. If you have relaxed with a cassette, the messages which were on the cassette have been recorded by your subconscious mind. If you were working on your own without a cassette, then at least you have relaxed and rejuvenated your body and mind.


8. CDs are available

from various spiritual centers, book stores and health food shops. In the beginning I would suggest that you buy or borrow a cassette so that you can get an idea concerning the rate and rhythm of how a relaxation is done. It will be easier to relax with a cassette in the beginning until you develop your ability with practice. Eventually you can let go of your dependency on the cassette (after trying out a variety of them if you like) and work on your own, creating the type of relaxation which is most suitable to you.

There are CD for self therapy, for self acceptance, self confidence, for expansion of love for all beings, for sending light to various parts of the body and for simply relaxing. There are also relaxations for children which help them to imagine themselves confident, concentrated and successful at school and with friends and family. You may also like to create your own cassette with the specific messages which you feel are most appropriate to your needs.


9. It is important to be regular in your practice of this simple technique which really does not require much time. If you cannot do it more frequently, do it at least once a day. Do not let your mind fool you into believing that there is no time. There is; you just need to see it. You can let go of something else, which is offering you less in your life and replace it with relaxation.

Also do not be fooled by the idea that you do not have the right to take this time for your self. These techniques will increase greatly both the quality and quantity of your service both to your family and profession. Also do not be fooled by the feeling that you are too nervous to relax, that you prefer to watch TV or do something which occupies your attention; that you do not have the concentration to relax. It is all a matter of habit. Your mind has learned to function in a certain way. You can gradually teach it to function in a different more effective and beneficial way.

It may be difficult at first. You may feel even more tension as you try and do not succeed in relaxing. This is because it is something new. Just as you could not walk when you were born and had to practice it, and became now able to walk through thinking, in the same way you will master this technique and it will become easy and enjoyable.


10. Do not be put off or afraid if in the beginning you have various negative side effects after doing a relaxation. This is simply the excess suppressed tension (which you have bottled up within you), coming out in the form of negative symptoms. The symptoms may be headaches, dizziness, a feeling of irritability or the need to cry or laugh nervously. You may feel pains in various parts of the body which were not there before (they are in the emotional and energy level but you do not feel them). You may have negative visions or hear unpleasant sounds while in the relaxation.

Or you may feel nothing at all. In 80% of the cases, people feel very wonderful. They experience a level of inner peace and harmony which they have never experienced before. If you are among the 20% who might have negative reactions at first, do not fear; this will happen only for a few times in the beginning and then will pass. If you feel that you need help to overcome the built up tension which is coming out, then seek out the help of a person experienced in these techniques. Sooner or later the tension which you have suppressed for so many years will be released and you will feel wonderful, not only in your relaxation but throughout the day. You will be lighter and freer, with more positive outlook in life.


11. The process of reprogramming the subconscious mind with positive thoughts and images can also be done while you are sleeping. You can purchase or make a cassette with the messages you would like to accept deep within you. Set up a timer switch to your tape player so that it will start up by itself about an hour after you have fallen asleep or an hour before you usually wake up. At these times you are usually in the receptive «alpha» state. These messages will by pass the filters of your conscious mind which usually block out whatever they do not believe and will be recorded directly into your subconscious mind. Many learn languages in this way. This does not, however, replace your need for conscious-willful deep relaxation.

I encourage you to start today employing these relaxation techniques and to treat your body and mind to a delight they have been waiting for and needing for a long time.

02 Self Healing

02 Self Healing

You can download a small ebook with many relaxation proceedures

at https://www.armonikizoi.com/store/products/life-coach-8-guided-relaxation-procedures

With the following content.

  1. An Introduction To Relaxation Techniques
  2. Positive Visualization Technique for Self Therapy and Prevention of Illness
  3. Techniques for Re-balancing Our Energy
  4.  A Deep Relaxation for Self Acceptance
  5.  A Deep Relaxation Technique for Transforming Childhood Experiences
  6.  Loving The Child That You Were
  7.  Letting Go Of Resentment
  8.  Entertaining The Opposite Emotion
  9.  Letting An Emotion Take A Form And Transforming It
  10.  Letting Our Pains, Illnesses Or Problems Take A Form
  11.  Recognizing And Manifesting Talents, Abilities And Qualities
  12.  A Visit To The Sun
  13.  Music Relaxation
  14.  Color Relaxation
  15.  Becoming The Light – Contact With God
  16.  Circle Of Love
  17.  Disidentifying With Our Bodies And Identifying With Our Souls
  18.  A  Meeting With Your Spiritual Guide
  19.  Finding Out Our Purpose In Life
  20.  Harmonizing The Energy  Centers & Other Possibilities

*****************

Also you can order CDs with guided relaxation techniques at

https://www.armonikizoi.com/store/products/category/en_store_audio_cd_other

*****************

And you can download various guided relaxation proceedures from

https://www.armonikizoi.com/downloads?category=4

************

2. POSITIVE VISUALIZATION TECHNIQUE FOR SELF THERAPY AND PREVENTION OF ILLNESS

Being ill is no fun. Often when ill we do not know what to do with ourselves and are overcome with negative feelings. These negative feelings of helplessness and hopelessness often worsen our physical condition and there ensues a vicious circle of physical pain, suffering and mental and emotional tension. Our negative reaction to illness worsen the illness. Tension brings pain and pain brings more tension. The best solution is any simple relaxation technique with positive visualization for removing stress and pain and sending healing energy to the problem area.

Each of us has within us vital energies which can heal our bodies. This is the life energy which keeps us alive and allows us to perform all the functions of our lives. This energy is guided by our thought patterns and concentration. Wherever our thoughts go, our energy goes to that area. Thus we can play a very important and essential role in our own therapy by learning to relax our bodies and mind by directing our concentration inwardly to the various parts of our body or our life in general which need healing. This is not difficult at all and can be learned just as any other human act can be learned through practice.


THE DOCTORS COULD NOT BELIEVE THEIR EYES

 

 

I remember the case of a friend of ours who was flying in a hand glider-kite and fell 20 meters to the ground cracking cervical vertebrae, thus remaining paralysed in the General National Hospital in Athens, Greece. He had only 5% movement in his arms and zero in his legs. A few of us went to explain to him how to relax his mind and body and how to concentrate his energy into his neck area and into his arms and legs and to imagine that he could move his hands and legs perfectly. He started doing this four or five times a day. He would ask his visitors to leave the room for ten minutes so that he could do this. He did this in a room with seven other patients and all their visitors. He closed his eyes and relaxed, while the television was blaring and cigarette smoke was choking the atmosphere.

Although the doctors told him that he would never be able to walk or gain full use of his hands, he started to get better every day. His hands and legs started to move. After two months, he left the hospital, and after another six months he came to visit me one day in the taxi cab he was driving, to tell me how the doctors at the hospital “made the sign of the cross”, in disbelief, when they saw him walk in to greet them. His body was much more fit and strong than mine.

There are thousands of such cases all over the world of people who have cured themselves with the power of relaxation and positive visualization. It is being used in many hospitals in America and Europe. It is being used especially in the cases of Cancer and whenever pain is present. One theory is that relaxation and peaceful vibrations in the mind stimulate the secretion of «natural body made anaesthetics» called endomorphins. It seems that an individual can learn to control the pain in his body. In addition he can direct healing energies to those parts of the body which are malfunctioning. Everyday we are discovering new unknown powers of the mind. It seems that we human beings have many powers which we have not realised and are waiting for us to uncover them as we continue with our human development.

A SELF HEALING VISUALIZATION TECHNIQUE

Find a comfortable straight back position, either lying down on your back or sitting straight on a chair. Close your eyes and start breathing more slowly and deeply. Relax your body from your toes to the top of your head concentrating on each part separately and allowing it to relax.

You may also use another method of relaxation similar to the one suggested by the Silva Mind Control. Take a deep breath and while exhaling repeat mentally and visualize the number three, three times in your mind. Then inhale again, and while exhaling, visualize and repeat the number two, three times in the mind. Then inhale again and on the exhalation repeat and visualise the number one, three times. Then count slowly backwards from ten to one allowing the body and mind to relax more deeply with each number. Feel that with each number you relax more deeply physically and mentally.

After using either of these techniques or any other relaxation technique, you can start to follow the following visualization procedure.


1)  Imagine a light in the center of the forehead


2)  Allow this light to begin to expand and fill the whole of the brain cavity. (If you cannot see the light you can feel it, or conceive of it as a thought. It has the same result).


3)  Allow this light and energy to start descending into the body


4)  Direct it to any parts of the body which need healing energies


5)  Feel the energy going there and imagine that area to be perfectly healthy. DO NOT IMAGINE THE ILLNESS. DO NOT IMAGINE THE PROBLEM.


6)  IMAGINE ONLY THE PERFECT FUNCTIONING OF THE BODY.


7)  Imagine your whole body functioning perfectly


8)  Imagine yourself happy, healthy, running, dancing, singing, playing


9)  Imagine yourself in harmony with those around you, giving and taking love


10) Remain in this blissful relaxed state as long as you can. Allow these peaceful healing energies to permeate every part of your body and mind.

This practice can be done for:


1) SELF HEALING


2) TO HELP OTHERS WHO ARE ILL – We can imagine all this going on in them


3) AS A PREVENTIVE MEASURE AGAINST ILLNESS

LIST OF POSSIBLE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES

LIST OF POSSIBLE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES

LIST OF POSSIBLE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES

 

Following you will find a list of possible childhood experiences. Perhaps they may not have occurred exactly as described here, but may have been similar. You may be reminded of something else you may want to note down.

 

These childhood experiences may have created a mistaken, inferior image of ourselves.

 

Note: (The numbers after each experience refers to the list of beliefs – subconscious conclusions of the child, which may have been programmed into the child’s vulnerable mind because of these experiences).

 

Wherever the questions refer to your parents or other persons of your childhood, think not only of the parents, but also of stepmothers, stepfathers, uncles, aunts, brothers and sisters, cousins, teachers and whatever other people existed in your life as a child and up to the age of 18.

 

YES —- NO —-1. Was it someone who got angry at you, scolded you, rejected you or accused you? Who and when?

 

YES —- NO —- 2. Were there people who fought among themselves or rejected or hurt one another? Who and when?

 

YES —- NO —- 3. Have you ever experienced the feeling of abandonment? Were you ever left alone, or felt that others didn’t understand you, or that there was no support? When? By whom? How?

 

YES —- NO —- 4. Did you ever feel the need for more affection, tenderness or expression of love? From whom and when (during which periods)?

 

YES —- NO —- 5. Were there persons in your environment who were often ill or who spoke often of illness? Who and when?

 

YES —- NO —- 6. Did you ever experience the feeling of humiliation in the presence of others or in connection with others? In which cases?

 

YES —- NO —- 7. Were you ever compared to others as to whether you were less or more capable or worthy? To whom, in which instances, and in connection with what abilities or character traits?

 

YES —- NO —- 8. Have you ever lost a loved one? Who and when?

 

YES —- NO —- 9. Did anyone ever approach you sexually without your consent?

 

YES —- NO —- 10. Were you ever aware of your parents or anyone else making love? Who and when? How did you feel and what did you think?

 

YES —- NO —- 11. Did your parents ever state that you were the only reason they continued staying together and that that had been a big sacrifice on their part? Or, did they ever tell you they have sacrificed a great deal for your sake, and that you are indebted to them? Who? When? About what matters? What exactly do you owe them.

 

YES —- NO —- 12. Did they ever accuse you for being the cause for their unhappiness or illness or problems? Who accused you and about what exactly? What did they mean that it was your fault, what does this fact mean to you? According to them what should you have done?

 

YES —- NO —- 13. Did they ever tell you that you are not going to achieve anything in your life, that you are lazy or incapable, or dumb? Who, when and concerning what matters?

 

YES —- NO —- 14. Were you ever caught playing with your genitals (alone or with others) and did anyone make you feel guilty for that? Who? When? What was their message?

 

YES —- NO —- 15. Did they often speak about guilt and punishment (either from some person (parent, police) or God)? Who? When? About what types of guilt and what type of punishment?

 

YES —- NO —- 16. Did any teacher ever make you feel humiliated in front of other children? When? How? Concerning what?

 

YES —- NO —- 17. In the company of other children, did you ever feel rejection or inferiority? By whom, and inferior by what criteria?

 

YES —- NO —- 18. Were you ever told that you were responsible for your siblings or for others in general, and that whatever happens to them is your responsibility? Who did? About whom? Concerning what matters were you responsible?

 

YES —- NO —- 19. Were you ever made to understand by some way (negative or positive) that, in order for someone to be acceptable and lovable, one must:

 

a. Be better than the others?

 

b. Be first at everything?

 

c. Be perfect, without faults?

 

d. Be intelligent and clever?

 

e. Be handsome / beautiful?

 

f. Have perfect order and cleanliness at home?

 

g. Have great success in his/her love life?

 

h. Have financial and social success?

 

i. Be accepted by everyone — him?

 

j. Be active in many ways? Achieve many things?

 

k. Always satisfy the needs of others?

 

l. Never say “no” to others?

 

m. Not to express his/her needs?

 

YES —- NO —- 20. Did they ever make you understand in some way that you are incapable of thinking, making decisions or achieving things by yourself, and that you will always need to listen to advice and depend on others? Who passed on this message to you? About what matters are you supposedly “incapable” of makind decisions or hundling properly?

 

YES —- NO —- 21. Did you ever have role models (parents, older siblings or others) who were, or still are, very dynamic and competent so that you felt:

 

YES —- NO —- a. The need to be like them?

 

YES —- NO —- b. The need to prove your worth; to be like them, to reach or even surpass these models?

 

YES —- NO —- c. Dispair, self-rejection, abandonment of effort, perhaps self-destructive (possibly subconscious) tendencies because you believed you could never measure up to them?

 

In connection with whom has any of this occured (a,c or c) and with what criteria of success?

 

YES —- NO —- 22. Has there ever been in your environment someone with unexpected, unpredictable, nervous or even schizophrenic behavior (possibly alcoholic or drug addict) so that you might not know what to expect from him? Has there been violence (physical or psychological)? By whom and what was the behavior like?

 

YES —- NO —- 23. Have you felt rejection or shame for one of your parents? For whom and why?

 

YES —- NO —- 24. Did you ever make the discovery that one of your parents has had an extra-marital affair? When and under what circumstances? How did you feel about that?

 

YES —- NO —- 25. Did they speak to you often about God the punisher? Who did, and about what?

 

YES —- NO —- 26. Did you ever feel that they told you one thing but did another, that there was no consistency to their word, that they had a double standard, one for themselves and another for the others, or that they were hypocrites, false and not true? Who and when? Concerning what topics?

 

YES —- NO —- 27. Upon what was your parents’ security based?

 

a) on money?

b) on the opinion of others?

c) on education?

d) on personal power?

e) on the unity of the family?

f) on property?

g) on one’s mate?

h) other?

YES —- NO —- 28. Were you a spoiled child that always had whatever it wanted and to whom no one ever refused a favour?

 

YES —- NO —- 29. Did they suppress your freedom of movement and expression? Did they force you to do things you did not want to do? (study, visits, dress). Did they forbid you to do things you wanted to do? What were you forced to do or prevented from doing?

 

YES —- NO —- 30. (FOR WOMEN ONLY). Did they in some way make you understand that since you are a girl:

 

a. You are worth less?

b. You are not safe without a man?

c. Sex is dirty (a sin)?

d. In order to be socially acceptable you must get married?

e. You are less competent than men?

f. Your only mission is to serve others?

g. You must not express your needs, your feelings, your opinion?

h. You must submit your self to your husband?

i. You must be beautiful to be acceptable?

 

YES —- NO —- 31. (FOR MEN ONLY). Did they in some way make you understand that since you are a boy:

 

a. You must be strong?

b. You must be superior, more competent, stronger and more intelligent than your wife?

c. Your worth is measured according to the success of your love life?

d. Your worth is measured according to your professional (financial) success?

e. You must compare yourself with other men?

LIST OF POSSIBLE BELIEFS OR “FALSE CHILDHOOD CONCLUSIONS”

LIST OF POSSIBLE BELIEFS OR “FALSE CHILDHOOD CONCLUSIONS”

LIST OF POSSIBLE BELIEFS OR “FALSE CHILDHOOD CONCLUSIONS” RESULTING FROM CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES

a. Perhaps the beliefs you are searching for are expressed somewhat differently than  in the phrases below.
b. Some phrases may seem more correct in another person, for example you or he or she.
c. Give time to yourself to search deeply inside you so you may see if there is still a small part of yourself that believes or feels what is here expressed.
d.  The numbers after the beliefs refer to the list of childhood experiences that could make someone form such beliefs.
BELIEFS – CHILDHOOD CONCLUSIONS
1. I’m unworthy, no matter what I do. (1,2)
2. I’m unworthy when I’m scolded, rejected, accused or when others are angry at me. (1,2)
3. I’m in danger when others are angry at me, when they scold, accuse or reject me. (1,2)
4. People don’t love me. (1,2)
5. People are aggressive. (1,2)
6. I’m responsible for the misery of others. (1,2)
7. I’m bad, evil. (1)
8. I’m alone in life. (1,2,3,6,7,8)
9. I am unprotected, vulnerable, in danger. (1,2,3)
10. No one wants to be with me. (1,2,3)
11. I’m not worthy of a permanent, steady relationship – I will be abandoned. (3)
12. There is no steady support, friendship, love in this world, or, if there is, I cannot have it or I    am not worthy of it. (1,2,3)
13. I am unworthy of affection, tenderness or expression of love. (1,3,4)
14. I am and will be treated unjustly. There is no justice. (1,3,4)
15. I cannot have what I want or what I need. (4)
16. I must not ask for what I need. (4)
17. The human body is weak and vulnerable to illness and pain. (5)
18. I’m in danger of getting sick, feeling pain, or dying. (5)
20. It’s my fault when someone close to me is ill. (5)
21. I have no right to be happy or in a good mood when others are sick. (5)
22. Illness shows weakness and I must not get sick so as not to show weakness. (5)
23. My selfworth is measured in relation to how I compare with others. (6,17)
24. Others  accept me  and want me only if they believe me to be strong and superior. (6,17)
25. Without others I’m unworthy and insecure. (6,17)
26. I must prove my worth in comparison to the others. (7,17)
27. Others don’t love me enough to stay with me. (3,8)
28. It’s my fault when someone close to me  dies. I’m guilty. (8)
29. I didn’t treat someone right before he died. I’m guilty. (3,8)
30. I cannot trust men (women). (1,3,8,9,10)
31. Those of the opposite sex want me only for my body. (9,10)
32. I’m guilty because I let  it happen. (9)
33. I’m in danger of men  women). (1,9,10)
34. Sex is violence. (9,10)
35. The sexual act is violent and causes pain. (9,10)
36. The sexual act is a compulsory act that to which one is submited by his companion. (9,10)
37. The sexual act is dirty and brutal. (9,10)
38. I must definitely repay others what they have given me. (11,12)
39. I don’t want to receive anything from anyone because then I’ll be indebted to them. I will not be free. (11,12)
40. I am always obligated to others no matter what I do. (11,12)
41. I must sacrifice what I believe in and want, in order to satisfy my parents (or others). (11,12)
42. The others are obliged to me for what I do for them. (11,12)
43. I’ m guilty because I have taken more than I have given (12)
44. I ‘m guilty (responsible) for the others’ reality (for their health, peace, success etc. (1,12,18)
45. I’m unworthy when those around me (especially children, companion, parents, brothers or sisters, friends) are not well. I am unsuccessful in my role. (11,18)
46. I have no right to be well, happy, in a good mood or to rest when others have problems or are not well. (11,12,18)
47. Others are responsible for my unhappiness, illness, failure. (11,12,18)
48. I must save others and the world. People are incapable of doing it themselves. (11,12,18)
49. Others don’t know, they must listen to me. I must solve their problems. (11,12,18)
50. I cannot have confidence in others to do things because they might make mistakes. (11,12,18)
51. If I don’t do it, no one will. (11,12,18)
52. I am treated unjustly because I always help and sacrifice myself for others, but they don’t help me when I need help. (11,12,18)
53. I must be always strong, must never show weakness or ask for help. (11,12,18)
54. Others must understand and respond to my needs without my expressing them (perhaps as I do to them). (11,12,18)
55. I am incapable. (11,12,13)
56. I am lazy. (13)
57. I’m not intelligent. (13)
58. I will be unable to succeed in my purpose. (12)
59. I must prove my selfworth to the others. (11,12,13)
60. I will never be able to prove my worth to the others. (13)
61. I am bad, dirty and guilty because I have sexual drives, feelings or needs. (14)
62. I am unworthy of God’s love. (1,3,4,5,7,8,9,11,12,13,14,22, 25)
63. I am a sinner, and God does not love me. (14,15)
64. God will punish me in life. Bad things will  definitely happen. (14,15)
65. Things cannot be always pleasant. (14,15)
66. Teachers and people of authority want to oppress me, to make me feel inferior, hurt me. (16)
67. I am in danger of being controlled by those in positions of power. (1,2,16)
68. We must fight authority. (1,16)
69. Others will laugh at me,  make fun of me. (16)
70. Others cannot be trusted. (1,3,6,7,17)
71. I must be better than the others in order to be worthy, loved and secure. (19a)
72. I must excel to be worthy. (19b, 19c)
73. I must be perfect, without faults. (19c)
74. I must not show weakness. (19c)
75. I must be more intelligent and informed than the others so that I may be worthy and accepted. (19d)
76. I must be handsome/beautiful (in order to be accepted). (19e)
77. I must have beautiful and new clothes, and to improve my appearance in different ways so that others may accept and love me. (19e)
78. My home (car, clothes etc.) must be absolutely clean and orderly so that I may be worthy. (19f)
79. I can’t relax unless everything is in order and clean. (19f)
80. Others must help me to keep things in order and clean. (19f)
81. Others are dirty and incapable. (19f)
82. I must be desired by many women (men) in order to be worthy. (19g)
83. I cannot trust my companion, he will deceive me (cheat on me). (19g)
84. Without financial and/or social success and recognition, I will not be worthy in the eyes of others. They will not pay attention to me, nor will they have esteem for me. (19h)
85. I must be happier than others to be worthy. (19h)
86. My worth depends on the opinion of the others. If they don’t accept me, I am not worthy. I must have their acceptance. (19i)
87. I am worthy only if I do a lot of things (or more than the others do). (19j)
88. I must satisfy others. They must be satisfied with me in order to be worthy. (19k)
89. I cannot say “no” to others, I will lose their love. They won’t want me. (19l)
90. I must not express my needs because: (19m)
a. I don’t have the right to.
b. The others don’t reciprocate.
c. It’s a sin.
d. I will be hurt.
91. I am incapable to think, to decide for myself. I must find someone to tell me what to do. (20)
92. I am incapable to face life’s difficulties, I must find someone to help me. (20)
93. If I become sick, they won’t ask me to have take on any responsibilities. (20)
94. It’s my parents’ fault that my life is a failure. (20)
95. I must become like my parents (or others). I must be equally perfect, dynamic, successful,    in order to be worthy and accept myself. (21)
96. I will never be able to measure up to my parents, I am unworthy. It’s better if I destroy myself. (21)
97. I reject the status quo and all this deception called success. I reject the system, I don’t want to belong to it. (21)
98. Those who are successful are unjust to the less fortunate. We must fight injustice. (21)
99. I cannot trust others (men, women, people around me) because at some point they will insult me. (21)
100. I am not worthy of respect and love. (1,22)
101. I am a mistake. (1,22)
102. My feelings don’t count. (1,22)
103. I am afraid of authority (parent, teacher, companion, people in charge). I will be hurt. (1,22)
104. I am afraid of a close relationship, I will be hurt. I’m in danger. (1,22)
105. I am afraid of criticism and aggressiveness. I’m in danger. (1,22)
106. Others will take advantage of me. (1,22)
107. I must not express my needs, nobody will listen, I will be hurt. (1,22)
108. I must not show my feelings. I must not show pain. (1,6,18,22)
109. My parent is not (was not) right. He is unworthy. He is unjust. (1,22,23)
110. Since my parent is unworthy, I am too. (1,22,23)
111. I am ashamed of my parents and myself. (1,22,23)
112. I don’t want to be like my father (mother). I don’t want to have the same weakness and to    make the same mistakes. (1,22,23)
113. God does not love me unconditionally. He gets angry at my faults, He will punish me. (15,25)
114. Something bad will happen to me. (I will get sick, my children will get sick and die. I will die, I will go mad(. (15,25)
115. People are double faced. They show one things but they think another and they do even another still. (22,26)
116. I am in danger of men, I cannot trust them. (1,22,26)
117. People are evil and want to use me . They want something of me. (26)
118. I must not rely on others, they will not be consistent and I will be hurt. (22,26)
119. I must not be truthful, otherwise I will lose in my transactions with other people. (26)
120. I must not show my true feelings. (26)
121. I am unworthy of, or cannot have, truthfulness from other people. (22,26)
122. I am not safe without enough money. (27)
123. I am not safe without other people’s acceptance. (27)
124. Without education I am not safe in this world. My child is not safe without education. (27)
125. Without family support ,I’m not safe. (3,27)
126. Without wealth I am not safe, nor are my children. (3,27)
127. Without a companion I am not safe. (27)
128. Without _________ I am not safe. (27)
129. I ‘m in general in danger. (1,3,8,22,27)
130. They must give me what I want when I want it – otherwise they don’t love me and then I’m not worthy. (28)
131. If they don’t give me what I want, I am not worthy and I am in danger. (28)
132. I cannot cope by myself, I need the others to give me what I need. (28)
133. I am a girl (woman) and so (30)
a. I’m worth less (or not at all).
b. I have fewer rights.
c. I am weak.
d. I am not safe without a man.
e. I must have a husband in order to be socially accepted.
f. I must not like sex.
g. I am incapable to deal with (machines, money, heavy work, “a man’s business”, with life in general).
h. My only reason to exist is only to serve my family. Otherwise I have no purpose.
i. My worth is valued by my appearance.
j. My worth is valued according to my children’s health, happiness, success.
k. I must submit to my husband (perhaps also to my children) and I must not express my own needs, feelings, opinions.
l. They won’t respect me no matter what I do.
m. I must not show that I’m worth as much as (or more than) men.
n. I must be (become) strong like a man in order to succeed in a man’s world, in order to be accepted and be worthy.
o. Men are my enemies and I must compete with them.
p. A man, with his behavior, will show me whether I am worthy or not.
134. I am a boy (man) and so (31) (ONLY FOR MEN)
a. I must be strong. I must not show weakness.
b. If I show weakness I won’t be accepted. I won’t be worthy.
c. I must be stronger than my wife. (More clever, able, successful etc.)
d. I must be wanted / desired by many women in order to be worthy.
e. My happiness is found in a woman.
f. A woman, by her behavior, will determine my selfworth.
g. My selfworth is valued according to my professional success (by comparison to the others in my circle).
h. My selfworth is measured according to how much money I have and how much wealth amass.
i. I must never cry.
j. I must not show a lot of feeling, tenderness or affection.
k. Illness is weakness. I must not get sick. I will be rejected.
l. My wife and children must obey me.
135. Without chemical substances I cannot face life (be calm, free).
a) Alcohol, b) Various types of food, c) cigarettes, d) hashish, e) drugs, f) coffee, g) sweets, h) chocolate etc. (22,25,29).
136. Without sex or love I cannot feel well (9,10,14,25,29,30,31)
137. Without travelling I cannot feel well (free). (29)
138.j They want to repress me, to restrict me. (29)
139. I must fight for my freedom. (29)
140. I must not allow any possible activity take place without personal participation. Otherwise I will miss something important. I won’t be free. (16,29)
141. I have no right to spend time
a. for myself
b. for my relaxation
c. for my health or development.
It is selfish. (11,12,13,15,18,19,21,25,30,31)
142. I can feel happy, secure and worthy only with this particular person, thing, situation, substance, activity. Nothing else will help me feel well. Not even something similar. (1,3,4,8,9,13,15,16,17,19,20,21,22,23,25,27,28,29,30,31)
143. If I don’t succeed in this particular endeavour, I will be unworthy and unhappy. (1,2,6,7,11,12,13,15,16,17,18,19,20,21,23,25,27,29,30,31)
SOME BELIEFS WHICH LEAD TO THE ROLE OF THE SELF – RIGHTEOUS- “GOOD” PERSON
144. I will be accepted only if I am right, good, in their eyes.
145. I must do what the others consider correct and good so that I might have their approval.
146. A good, correct (upstanding) person is worth more than the others.
147. Only if I am superior I am worthy.
148. If I am unworthy, then the others won’t want me, I will be alone and unsafe because I won’t even have God’s protection. If I am unworthy, I am in danger.

CERTAIN CONVICTIONS THAT LEAD TO THE WAY OF PERFECTION, STRENGTH
149. I am worthy and safe only if I am strong, able, perfect.
150. If my weaknesses (faults) show:
a. I will be rejected, humiliated, ridiculed. I will lose people’s respect, esteem, love.
b. I will be deserted.
c. I will be taken advantage of.
d. I will be dominated, controlled and I will lose my freedom.
151. He who has weaknesses:
a. Is unworthy.
b. Is vulnerable and he will be hurt, he will be made to suffer by others and by life in general.
152. Life is difficult, hard and there is no protection, no compassion. I must be strong to survive.
153. I am the only strength in my life.
154. Other people are incapable for doing anything right. I cannot rely on them. They ‘re going to mess up things.
155. My strength, ability and perfection are measured according to the results of my efforts (not by the effort or motives so much).
156. Man is worthy according to his abilities and achievements.
157. In order to be worthy, I must do everything to perfection.
CONVICTIONS THAT LEAD TO THE ROLE OF VICTIM
158. Other people are responsible for my reality, my problems, my happiness, my unhappiness, my health, my illness.
159. I have been treated unjustly by other people, by life, by God.
160. I am unworthy of something better. I cannot have anything better.
161. As long as I am treated unjustly, then I’m JUSTIFIED because the others are unjust. As long as I am treated unjustly, then I am upstanding and am worthy.
162. I cannot protect myself from others. If I clash, I will be wounded and hurt. Better to yield, to repress myself, to sacrifice myself.
163. I am responsible for other people’s reality. Therefore I must sacrifice myself for them.
164. I am an inferior being and I haven’t the right to express my needs, my feelings, my convictions.
165. If I don’t comply, I will be hurt.
166. I’m incapable to face life on my own. I need other people. Thus I must submit to the injustice in order that they don’t find me out.
167. I am guilty and not worthy of anything better.
168. I’m a woman and it is my role to sacrifice myself.
CONVICTIONS THAT LEAD TO THE ROLE OF THE WEAK, THE INCAPABLE, THE CHILD
169. I am incapable to face the difficulties of life.
170. I am not capable enough to satisfy my parents’ demands, to fulfill the plans they have for me.
171. I won’t be accepted, I won’t be loved if I try and don’t succeed. Better not to take a chance.
172. Life is difficult and dangerous.
173. I need my parents (companion, brother etc.) in order to feel secure. Without them I am in danger.
174. I am weak, without enough intelligence or abilities or  talents. I have no qualifications. I am unworthy and will not succeed.
175. I do not have enough discrimination to make decisions. I need other people to tell me what to do.
176. If I grow up and take responsibility for my life:
a. I will lose my purity. Grown ups are bad and immoral. God will not love me.
b. I will fail.
c. No one will pay attention to me.
d. I will get tired. I will be inconvenienced.
CONVICTIONS THAT LEAD TO THE ROLE OF BEING GUILTY, UNDESERVING, BAD, SINFUL
177. I am guilty, bad and unworthy because:
a. I have committed a sin which is …..
b. Other people have not given me love and affection and this proves I am worthless.
c. Other people have told me I am worthless.
d. Other people have deserted me (or they died), which means that I am unworthy (or unloved), or that it was God’s punishment.
e. I have not succeeded to become perfect.
f. I did not succeed to satisfy others.
g. I did not succeed to protect other people and to create for them a reality without problems (at one time brothers/sisters, now perhaps children, companion, parents).
h. I belong to an inferior race, religion, social clan.
i. I am not intelligent, capable, successful.
j. God does not love me (my parents, my grandparents told me so).
178. He who makes mistakes is guilty, sinful.
179. God does not forgive. He hates and punishes sinners. My faults cannot be forgiven.
180. He who makes mistakes is not worth having a good life (health, happiness, success, respect from others).
181. I am responsible for other people’s reality, and I am guilty when they are not happy and satisfied.
182. I am guilty when others criticise me or scold me or have a “long” face or don’t want me.
183. I am guilty when others don’t trust me.
184. I feel guilty when I don’t succeed in my purposes.
185. I am guilty because:
a. I eat too much. b. I smoke. c. I drink alcohol. d. I don’t work enough.
e. My children have problems. f. Others are not pleased with me.
g. I don’t do my best (i.e., I never say “no”). h. I don’t help as much as I could.
i. I have sexual drives.
j. Other.
186. I am guilty, no matter what I do.
187. I don’t have the right to have others respect my needs.
188. I will be punished. Something bad will happen to me or to my family.
189. All the other people are good. I am inferior.
190. I must do a great deal, more than the others, in order to be worthy.
191. When I am criticised or others raise their voice, it means I am worthless.
192. I must be perfect (in cleanliness, orderliness, appearance) in order to be worthy of love and acceptance.
193. I am selfish.
194. I don’t have the right to ask for anyone’s help.
195. No one can love me.
196. I will get sick. I will die.
197. I don’t have the right to say “no”.
CONVICTIONS THAT LEAD TO THE ROLE OF PARENT, TEACHER, SAVIOUR, PERSON-IN-CHARGE
198. I am responsible for other people:
For
a. their health
b. their happiness
c. their success
d. their harmony
e. their development
f. their security
g. Anything that happens to them.
199. If I do not create a perfect reality (as above) for them, I have failed in my role and I am worthless.
200. If others are not pleased with me, I have  failed and I am worthless.
201. If others don’t trust me, I am worthless in my role.
202. If others don’t listen to me, don’t obey me, don’t carry out my instructions, don’t follow my advice, then I am inefficient in my role and I am worthless.
203. If I am unworthy in my role, I will not have others’ esteem and consideration. I will be left alone, I am in danger.
204. If I don’t control everything around me, something might go wrong. I cannot depend on others. If I am not in control, then I am in danger.
205. If I show weakness, need or faults:
a. I will be rejected. I will be unwanted, I will be in danger.
b. They will use this knowledge of my weaknesses in order to hurt me. I will be in danger.
206. I am worthy only when I am in a superior position, i.e., teacher, saviour, parent. Only then I   am secure.
207. If others need me (as teacher, saviour, parent), they won’t abandon me. I will not be left alone.
208. When alone, I am in danger.
209. If others need me, they will love me, they will give me what I need to have from them (tenderness, affection, love – and certainly respect etc.).
210. In this role, I can control things.
CONVICTIONS WHICH LEAD TO THE ROLE OF A REVOLUTIONARY, REACTIONARY, ANTAGONIST
211. I am in danger from society, parents, teachers, authorities.
212. I may lose
a. my freedom
b. my dignity
c. my worth
d. my security
213. Others may do me wrong, may wound me, may humiliate me.
214. I am weak, impotent, vulnerable. I will not succeed in this society
a. to achieve anything
b. to protect myself
c. to be happy
215. I need others’ approval, I am worthless and unsafe without their approval and assistance.
216. I am not intelligent. I don’t possess the internal wisdom, worth and power in order to live my life without other people.
217. I am in danger when they disagree with me because
a. perhaps I am wrong
b. I need them
c. they may reprove me, and I will be hurt.
218. If I don’t react and go against them, they will think they are right and so I will lose my hts and my power.
219. I’ll show them. I will destroy myself and they will worry. They will feel guilty.
220. When they agree with me, then I’m right. Then I am worthy and secure.
221. I must fight for my  freedom and justice.
222. Other people don’t love me and I must protect myself from them.
223. If I don’t fight I will perish. I am in danger.
224. If I admit they’ re right when I perceive them to be, they will use the fact on other occasions against me.
225. People are hypocrites. They are two-faced. I cannot trust them. I am in danger.
226. I will never achieve success. Better not participate. Better to reject the entire game of    success.
227. I’m a girl (woman) and I must protect my rights in a man’s world.
228. I am a victim of racism and I must protect myself.
CONVICTIONS THAT LEAD TO THE ROLE OF SOMEONE INTELLIGENT, INFORMED, SUPERIOR, KNOWLEDGEABLE, COUNSELLOR.
229. My worth is measured according to my mental ability.
230. My mind’s worth is measured according to:
a. How it compares to others.
b. How much information it possesses.
c. How fast it works.
d. If it’s right.
e. How much others think or show with their behavior that they believe it is worthy.
231. I am not sufficiently worthy, I don’t know enough. They will reject me.
232. I will be unwanted, I will be left alone, and then I’m in danger.
233. I must learn a great deal, I must cultivate my mind.
234. I must show others that my mind is worthwhile in order that they may accept me and love me. Then I will be safe.
235. If there is someone else who knows a great deal, they will love him more. I must show that  I know more than him. I must make him look inferior and I must exaggerate my selfworth.
236. I must never acknowledge that the other person is right. If I do, I will lose my superiority.
237. Life is difficult, and I am alone. I must be intelligent in order to survive.
238. It is only those who are intelligent that attract the love, attention and tenderness they need.
239. I owe it to my parents to become educated, to become accepted for my education and my knowledge.
240. I must prove my selfworth to others.
241. I am responsible for other people and so I must be intelligent (more intelligent).
242. If I am clever, I can protect myself from the exploitation and wickedness of others.
243. I don’t want to be like my parent.
CONVICTIONS LEADING TO THE ROLE OF A PERSON INDIFFERENT, IRRESPONSIBLE, FREE, MISCHIEVOUS, RUN-WAY
244. I am worthy as long as I achieve a great deal, as long as I am able.
245. I am worthy only when I have a lot of responsibilities and succeed in dealing with them.
246. I am worthless if I do not succeed because:
a. Life is difficult.
b. I’m not intelligent, capable, strong.
c. Others are more capable than I am.
d. I’m afraid of failure.
247. If I try and, then fail, I will be rejected and then I will be alone and in danger.
248. Better not to try. Better to pretend that it doesn’t interest me, that I reject this game.
249. I will tire and will suffer if I have responsibilities. If I do nothing, others will take over.
250. Others do things better than me.
251. I reject their superficial life and their stress.
252. Better not to play, than to play and lose.
253. If I become active, they won’t pay attention to me. They will think I don’t need them.
254. Responsibility brings criticism from others in connection with the result.
255. Since God punishes for mistakes, I won’t do anything and so I won’t make mistakes.
256. I don’t want to fail like my parents.
257. I can’t trust others.
258. I am a spoiled child, they must take care of me.
CONVICTIONS LEADING TO THE ROLE OF GENERAL, DICTATOR, AGGRESSOR, SLAYER
259. I am weak and worthless, I am in danger, my safety is in danger.
260. Life and people are hard and difficult. They will hurt me.
261. I must be hard, difficult and sometimes aggressive in order to
a. Have others’ esteem
b. Be superior
c. Keep people at a distance so they won’t hurt me.
262. I don’t want them to step all over me as they did on my father (or mother).
263. I’m alone in life. No one is interested in me. If I don’t take care of myself, no one will.
264. I, alone, am right. They must listen and obey me.
265. No one loves me. They didn’t give me the tenderness and love I needed. I must get back   at them.
266. Only the strong, the leader, is worthy and important.
267. I must keep them away so they won’t hurt me.
268. Since they look upon me as bad, evil, and abusive, I might as well be that way.
269. I am responsible for others. Unless I keep them in order with a little fear, we will have problems, I will not have control.
THE ROLE OF MALE OR FEMALE
270. I am a woman (man).
271. I am secure and I am worthy only if I succeed in this role.
272. I must have a companion in order to have worth and safety.
273. Companionship is the purpose of life and the basic meaning of life.
274. Companionship is difficult and I might get hurt because:
a. The other will not love me as I am.
b. The other will hurt me.
c. The other will abandon me.
275. I cannot let myself into a relationship because I will get hurt.
276. I am worthy when:
a. My companion loves me alone, exclusively.
b. The opposite sex desires me and admires me.
c. When I am better than the others.
d. I am wanted sexually.
277. A woman must sacrifice herself for her husband (must obey him).

 

LIST OF POSSIBLE EMOTIONS

LIST OF POSSIBLE EMOTIONS

LIST OF POSSIBLE EMOTIONS

DISCOURAGED
REJECTION
ANXIETY
DEMEANED
HURT
WORRY
DISILLUSIONMENT
INSECURITY
ABUSED
ANGER
HATE
DEPRESSION
FRUSTRATION
LONELINESS
BITTERNESS
JEALOUSY
ENVY
UNWORTHY
RAGE
SELF REJECTION
SELF DOUBT
SHAME
INJUSTICE
GUILT
ABANDONMENT
OTHER

LOVE
HAPPINESS
COMPASSION
UNDERSTANDING
AFFECTION
BROTHERLINESS
UNITY
SECURE
PEACEFUL
COURAGE
ENCOURAGEMENT
JOY
PATIENCE
GRATITUDE
ACCEPTANCE
RESPECT
FULFILMENT
FAITH
HOPE
PEACE
AFFIRMATION
RESPECT
SATISFACTION
PRIDE
ESTEEM

OTHER

1. WHICH EMOTIONS WOULD YOU LIKE TO FREE YOURSELF FROM?

2. WHICH ARE THE BELIEFS FROM WHICH THESE EMOTIONS FLOW FORTH?

3. HOW DO YOU REACT WHEN YOU FEEL THESE EMOTIONS?

LIST OF POSSIBLE NEEDS

LIST OF POSSIBLE NEEDS

LIST OF POSSIBLE NEEDS
Almost all of our needs are expressions of our basic needs to protect our:

a. Feelings of Security and Safety
b. Sense of Self Worth
c. Feeling of Freedom
d. Ability to satisfy our desires and pleasures
e. To love and be loved – to belong
f. To be recognized by the whole – power
g. To live a meaningful life
h. To evolve spiritually
i. Self Actualization
j. To unite with the world and God

The above mentioned basic needs might be expressed as some of the following:

1. To have the freedom to do what I like
2. To be disciplined
3. To create and express my self
4. To be responsible towards others
5. To be loving and caring
6. To satisfy my desires
7. To forgive
8. To have my rights respected
9. To evolve spiritually
10. To have plenty of money
11. To do work which has meaning for me
12. To have a deep meaningful relationship
13. To be in harmony with my conscience
14. To beloved as I am
15. To have free time
16. To be respected
17. For affection
18. For more open communication
19. To be left alone when not feeling well
20. To avoid contact with others
21. To go out more often.
22. To have time alone when feeling the need
23. For more rest
24. For more help with the chores
25. For more attention when talking
26. For a more peaceful environment
27. To be accepted exactly as I am
28. To do more things together.
29. For more freedom of movement and expression
30. For greater responsibility from others
31. For others to be on time
32. For more help and cooperation in keeping order and cleanliness
33. To be able to behave in the way I like in my home.
34. To be able to express my self honestly
35. To express my needs to others, and have them respected
36. To have revenge
37. To find inner peace

LIST OF POSSIBLE FEARS

LIST OF POSSIBLE FEARS

LIST OF POSSIBLE FEARS
FEAR IS OUR GREATEST OBSTACLE TOWARDS HAPPINESS, GROWTH, SUCCESS, PEACE OF MIND AND HARMONIOUS RELATIONSHIPS. BEHIND EVERY NEGATIVE EMOTION THERE IS SOME HIDDEN FEAR. LET US SEARCH OUT THESE FEARS AND LIBERATE OURSELVES FROM THEM. REMEMBER THAT YOU MAY NOT CONSCIOUSLY FEEL A FEAR BUT THAT IT MAY A SUBCONSCIOUS FEAR – CHECK OUT YOUR INNER CHILD.

A FEAR CAN BE EXPRESSED AS A VARIETY OF EMOTIONS SUCH AS: INSECURITY, ANXIETY, UNCOMFORTABLENESS, REJECTION FOR OTHERS OR FOR OUR SELVES, WEAKNESS, WORRY, INABILITY, CONFUSION, FEAR, DEPRESSION, DENIAL, SHOCK, HYSTERIA, PANIC, PARALYSIS, ANGER, HATE, AGGRESSIVNESS, VIOLENCE ETC.

Some of the more common fears are:

YOUR DEATH
SUDDEN DEATH BY ACCIDENT
DEATH OF A LOVED ONE
ILLNESS
BEING PARALYSED
GROWING OLD
WAR
EARTHQUAKES
SNAKES, RATS, MICE, COCKROACHES
DOGS, CATS
FAILURE AT WORK, IN RELATIONSHIPS, AT SCHOOL, AT LIFE
REJECTION FROM OTHERS
BEING LAUGHED AT BY OTHERS
CRITICISM
LONELINESS
FINANCIAL INSECURITY
OTHERS’ AGGRESSIVNESS
THE DARK
THE UNKNOWN
GOD OR HIS PUNISHMENT
LOOSING YOUR FREEDOM
LOOSING YOUR SELF WORTH
CONFLICTS WITH OTHERS
THE SEA, HEIGHTS, FIRES
CARS, PLANES, BOATS
ELEVATORS, SMALL PLACES
LARGE GATHERINGS OF PEOPLE
TO TRAVEL BY YOUR SELF
TO LOSE YOUR SANITY
TO BE REJECTED IN A LOVE RELATIONSHIP
THE OPPOSITE SEX
MICROBES AND DIRTY THINGS
OTHERS