Inner experiences for healing the Inner Child
This work is best done with an experienced guide.
If you come into contact with strong negative emotions, then cease until you have that guidance.
We are presenting you here with some methods for healing and becoming free from the effect of past experiences.
You can start out by reading the chapter on Healing the Inner Child at this link and then move on to the steps below.
2. Record after each experience how you felt then and how you feel now that you remember it.
3. You can then write a letter to the persons involved, expressing how you felt and what you actually needed rom them.
4. Do EFT for each experience focusing on each of the emotions and each of the aspects of the event, as if watching a movie and healing what you feel abut each scene.
See here a series of videos on how to do EFT.
HERE ARE A NUMBER OF ACOUSTIC FILES WITH ENERGY PSYCHOLOGY TECHNIQUES.
(You can download them with a right click.)
If you experience strong emotional changes or are taking drugs for your mental balance,
ask your health professional whether it is good for you employ energy exercises.
6. TAT for forgiveness as guided here.
5. Once you have reduced the emotional charge around these events, you can begin to do EFT with Choices in which you introduce new alternative perceptions which bring you peace and freedom from the effect of the event.
6. After EFT with Choices, you can do the brain balancing procedure for installing the new alternative belief. Here you can find an mp3 file with guidance for the procedure.
Download the file for the Brain Balancing (Right click to download)
also learn the brain balancing procedure for inspired questions here
Below is the position for the brain balancing procedure
7. When you feel ready you can begin to do regressions for transforming the memory of the event with alternative perceptions thus actually changing the “past”. Here is the guided procedure.
Download the file for the regression (Right click to download)
8. When ready to forgive, then you can perform TAT for forgiveness as guided here.
Download the file for the TAT for forgiveness (Right click to download)
Healing Childhood Experiences with EFT
EFT is an extremely powerful way to free ourselves from the emotional charge of childhood events and situations, whether traumatic or not.
Such “energy psychology” techniques are a revolution and a blessing, allowing us to defuse childhood experiences quickly and painlessly.
Often when working on present issues, we are likely to be linked to childhood experiences, which need to be resolved before our present sensitivities can be healed. Thus we need to be proficient at this process.
Note: Please refer to the message at the end of this chapter about precautions necessary when dealing with suppressed intensely-charged childhood emotions.
The first step is to make a list of the emotions, beliefs or experiences, which need to be dealt with. In order to help you with that, we have listed some of the more common disturbing childhood experiences.
Possible Childhood Experiences
Refer to the list of possible childhood experiences
Possible Mistaken Childhood Conclusions
As children we tend to make many false conclusions about reality, usually burdening ourselves with the responsibility for everything, including our parents’ anger, absence, abandonment, unhappiness, illness, separation, death, etc.
We tend to conclude that there is something wrong with us and that we are not good and do not deserve the health, happiness, love and attention we need.
Some possible false beliefs might be:
1. I must be like the others in order for them to accept me.
2. If they do not love and accept me, I am not safe.
3. If others do not accept me, I am not worthy.
4. I must be “right” in order to be worthy and for them to love me.
5. I must be perfect in order for others to accept me and love me.
6. I must be better than others in order to be worthy.
7. I must have _____________ in order to be safe.
8. I must have _____ in order to worthy.
9. I must achieve ________in order to be worthy.
10. I must be loved and accepted by those close to me in order to be happy.
11. In order to feel worthy, I must be able and successful.
12. My happiness is not in my own hands. I am the victim of external factors.
13. My self-worth is dependent on:
- What others think of me.
- b. The results of my efforts.
- c. My appearance
- d. My money and fortune.
- e. My knowledge
- f. How I compare to others.
- g. If I am married.
- h. My professional position.
- i. Other __________
- I am safe only if I have:
c. Specific persons in my life
d. The others’ approval
e. Other ________
15. I am responsible for others’ reality, (Their health, safety, happiness, success, and satisfaction
16. Others are responsible for my reality and how I feel.
17. I am not a good person.
Working with Childhood experiences with EFT
Α. Make a list of the events, situations, beliefs or emotions which you would like to free yourself from.
Note: EFT works better on emotions we can feel rather than on beliefs, thus in each of cases you choose to work with, it will be more effective to work with the emotions created by that event, situation or belief brings. If you cannot locate or feel the emotion, then work with the belief or “this feeling.”
B. Now, for each experience, seek to answer the following questions.
- 1. What are the various aspects of this experience? (Think of specific actions, stances, words, attitudes, images, sounds, and scenes.)
It may help to talk or write about this experience describing in detail exactly what happened.
Every time you sense any feelings about what you are speaking or writing about, you can either work on it directly or note it down on paper in order to work on it later.
In this way you are making a list of aspects of each experience which may be creating the disturbed energy field which is creating the emotions you would like to become free from.
2. Now for each aspect of each experience we will need to determine, to the best of our ability, what emotions we were or are feeling and what the SUD emotional charge is.
There may very well be a number of simultaneous emotions such as hurt, fear, guilt, injustice and anger. We will need to deal with which ever is most intense and then with the others as they come to the surface.
3. Chose an aspect and specific emotion that you would like to begin with.
4. Now we are ready to employ EFT on this emotion or aspect. As we remove this, it is likely that other emotions and aspects will come to the surface to be discharged.
The Set Up
- We rub on the sore spot on one side (or tap the side of the hand) repeating phrase “A” three times.
- Then we repeat phrase “B” three times while rubbing on the sore spot on the other side (or tapping on the side of the other hand).
- Then we repeat the “C” reminder phrase while tapping on the 12 points.
1. The Set Up for the primary emotion,
which we are feeling:
A.1. Even though I feel (the emotion) _____________ when I think of (the childhood event or situation)_____, I deeply and profoundly love myself.
A.2. Even though until now I have felt (the emotion) _____________ as a child when I thought about (the childhood event or situation)_____, I now deeply and profoundly love myself.
A.3. Even though until now I have felt (the emotion) _____________ as a child when I thought about (the childhood event or situation)_____, I now experience my inner security and self-worth.
B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept, realize that it is in my benefit) to be free from this (emotion) ______.
C. Reminder Phrase = (The Emotion) ____ because (the event) ___________.
2. Secondary Emotions
If there is any guilt, shame or other feelings about having the above-mentioned emotions, then those feelings will also need to be dealt with in the same way.
A.1. Even though I feel (emotions such as guilt, shame, self-rejection, or anger) _____________ because I feel (primary emotion)_____ about (childhood experience) __________, I deeply and profoundly love myself.
A.2. Even though until now I have felt (emotions such as guilt, shame, self-rejection, or anger) _____________ because until now I have felt (primary emotion)_____ about (childhood experience) __________, I now understand myself, my feelings and my reactions.
B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept, realize that it is in my benefit) to be free from this (emotion) ______.
C. Reminder Phrase = (The Emotion) ____ because (of the emotion we are witnessing we are feeling) ___________
If there is any resistance towards letting go of those emotions, then that resistance will also need to be removed in the same way. Consider some of the possible types of resistance. We need to work on each possible resistance separately.
Possible Beliefs which might cause resistance towards letting go of these emotions.
1. I have felt this way a long time and do not know what it will be like to be without this emotion. It will be like losing an important part of myself or my life. (We have become attached or addicted to feeling this way.)
2. I believe that I need this emotion in order to protect myself from others. (Possibly anger, depression, injustice or pain.)
3. I will lose my power or control over others. (Perhaps anger, depression, dissatisfaction.)
4. I will lose others’ attention if I do not have this emotion.
5. I will lose my self-worth if I do not feel this way. (Especially feeling like the victim, a role we play to create feelings of goodness, righteousness or self-worth)
6. If I allow others to be free from feeling guilty or responsible about me, I will lose control over them.
7. I will need to take responsibility for my life.
8. I must feel guilty in order to be a good person. If I stop feeling guilty or responsible I will not be a good person.
9. I will need to be happy – something which scares me.
10. I will have to recognize my self-worth – which also scares me.
In such cases of inner obstacles,
we can use the following phrases:
A.1. Even though I fear letting go of this emotion because _____ (resistance) ________________, I deeply and profoundly love myself.
A.2. Even though until now I have feared letting go of this emotion because _____ (resistance) ________________, I now realize that it is much better for me to let it go.
Note: If we sense we have some resistance but do not know what it is then we can just say:
A.3. “Even though I seem to have some resistance towards letting go of this emotion, I deeply and profoundly love myself.”
B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept, realize that it is in my benefit) to be free from this (fear or resistance) ________.
C. Reminder Phrase = (The emotion or resistance) _________.
4. Embodied emotions
If we find that these emotions are manifesting as physical symptoms either in general or during the process of employing EFT, then we might need to address them for a few rounds in the following way.
A.1. Even though I have this (physical phenomenon) ____________ in my (part of body) ___________, I deeply and profoundly love myself.
A.1. Even though until now I have had this (physical phenomenon) ____________ in my (part of body) ___________, I am now totally free from it.
B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept) to be free from this (physical phenomenon) ______ in my (part of body)_____.
C. Reminder Phrase = (Physical phenomenon) ______ in my (part of body) _______.
Some of us may have emotionally charged memories stored in our subconscious. We need to release these from our energy system in order to create health, happiness, peace, clarity, evolution and harmonious relationships. Working with them, in some cases, may temporarily bring to the surface some unpleasant or disturbing feelings. We are, of course, experiencing these negative energies subconsciously and psychosomatically anyway.
Not dealing with them would be like knowing there is a fire in our cellar and refusing to go down and put it out because that would be unpleasant and we would get temporarily dirty. But that unattended fire will soon find its way to our bedroom and living room and our whole house.
So denial and avoidance are not the solution.
Some guidelines for proceeding would be:
- If you are going to work with your childhood experiences or any other intense emotions and especially depression, you should have an experienced guide for this work. Someone whom you trust and have access to if you need help.
- Do not do such work immediately before sleeping, driving or important meetings.
- Thanks to Gary Craig’s work with this, you can work “Hypothetically” and then directly with the charged experience.
- First without closing your eyes or in any way trying to relive your negative experience, ask yourself, “ IF I were to come into experiential and emotional contact with this memory, how disturbed would I feel?” So here you take an “Hypothetical SUD”.
- Then employ as many rounds of Hypothetical EFT as you need to get the Hypothetical SUD to 3 or less.
- Now actually close your eyes and seek to remember the event as vividly as you can and see where your real SUD is and continue to employ EFT on the emotions you have when in direct emotional contact with the event.
- Continue to work with any other aspects, which might come up.
Our experience is that having worked with the Hypothetical SUD for a number of rounds we have actually corrected to a great degree the actual energy field. Thus we have an almost painless way of getting from these inner obstacles to health, peace, happiness and success.
We deserve a happy and healthy life.