Healing Our Inner Child, part 6: Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT)

We suggest that you also read the parts previous to this.

Those of you unfamiliar with the EFT techniques would benefit from going to:
http://www.Emofree.com
and once you have mastered the basic technique to:
http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/eft/

Working with Childhood experiences with EFT

Make a list of the events, situations, beliefs or emotions which you would like to free yourself from.

Note: EFT works better on emotions which we can feel, thus in each of cases you choose to work with, it will be more effective to work with the emotion created by that event, situation or belief brings.

1. ____
2. ____
3. ____

B. Now, for each experience, seek to answer the following questions.

1. What are the various aspects of this experience? (Think of specific actions, stances, words, attitudes, images, sounds, and scenes.)

As suggested by Gary Craig (www.emofree.com), it may help to talk about or write about this experience describing in detail exactly what happened.

Every time you sense any feelings about what you are speaking or writing about, you can either work on directly or note it on paper in order to work on it later.

In this way you are making a list of aspects of each experience which may be creating a disturbed energy field which is creating the emotions which you would like to become free from.

2. Now for each aspect of experience we will need to realize to the best of our ability what emotions we were or are feeling and what the SUD emotional charge is.

There very well may be a number of simultaneous emotions such as hurt, fear, guilt, injustice and anger. We will need to deal with which ever is most intense and then with the others as they come to the surface.

3. Chose then an aspect and specific emotion which you would like to begin with.

4. Now we are ready to employ EFT on this emotion of the aspect. As we collapse this, then likely other emotions and then other aspects will come to the surface to be discharged.

The Set Up

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Note: We use two phrases when doing the set up.

a. We rub on the sore spot on one side (or tap the side of the hand) repeating phrase “A” three times.

b. Then we repeat phrase “B” three times while rubbing the on the sore spot on the other side (or tapping on the side of the other hand).

c. Then we repeat the “C” reminder phrase while tapping on the 12 points.

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The Set Up for the primary emotion which we are feeling:

A. Even though I feel (the emotion) ____ when I think of (the childhood event or situation)____, I deeply and profoundly love myself.
Or

Even though I felt (the emotion) ____ as a child when (the childhood event or situation)____, I deeply and profoundly love myself.

B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept, realize that it is in my benefit) to be free from this (emotion) ____.

C. Reminder Phrase = (The Emotion) because (the event) ____

Secondary Emotions

If there is any guilt, shame or other feelings about having the above-mentioned emotions, then those feelings will also need to be dealt with in the same way.

A. Even though I feel (the emotion such as guilt, shame, self-rejection, anger) ____ when I realize that I feel (primary emotion)____ about (childhood experience) ____, I deeply and profoundly love myself. .

B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept, realize that it is in my benefit) to be free from this (emotion) ____.

C. Reminder Phrase = (The Emotion) because (the event) ____

Resistance

If there is any resistance towards letting go of those emotions, then that resistance will also need to be collapsed in the same way. Consider some of the possible types of resistance. We need to work on each possible resistance separately.

Possible Beliefs which might cause resistance towards letting go of these emotions.
(Psychological Reversal)

1. I have felt this way a long time and do not know what it will be like to be without this emotion. It will be like losing an important part of myself or my life. (We have become attached or addicted to feeling this way.)

2. I believe that I need this emotion in order to protect myself from others. (Possibly anger, depression, injustice, pain)

3. I will lose my power or control over others. (Perhaps anger, depression, dissatisfaction.)

4. I will lose others? attention if I do not have this emotion.

5. I will lose my self-worth if I do not feel this way. (Especially feeling the victim or angry from which we seek to get our feelings of goodness, rightness – self-worth)

6. I will allow others to be free from feeling guilty or responsible about me. I will lose control over them.

7. I will need to take responsibility for my life.

8. I will need to be happy – something which scares me.

9. I will have to recognize my self-worth – which also scares me.

In such cases of inner obstacles, we can use the following phrases:

A. Even though I fear letting go of this emotion because ____ (resistance) ____, I deeply and profoundly love myself.

Note: If we sense we have some resistance but do not know what it is then we can just say

“Even though I seem to have some resistance towards letting go of this emotion, I deeply and profoundly love myself.”

B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept, realize that it is in my benefit) to be free from this (fear or resistance) ____.

C. Reminder Phrase = (The emotion or resistance) ____.

Embodied emotions

If we find that these emotions are manifesting as physical symptoms either in general or during the process of employing EFT, then we might need to address them for a few rounds in the following way.

A. Even though I have this (physical phenomenon) ____ in my (part of body) ____, I deeply and profoundly love myself.

B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept) to be free from this (physical phenomenon) ____ in my (part of body)____.

C. Reminder Phrase = (physical phenomenon) in my (part of body)

Important Note:

Some of us may have stored emotionally charged memories in our subconscious. We need to release these from our energy system in order to create health, happiness, peace, clarity, evolution and harmonious relationships.

Working with them, however, in some cases, may temporarily bring to the surface some unpleasant or disturbing feelings. We are of course experiencing these negative energies subconsciously and psychosomatically anyway.

Not dealing with them would be like knowing there is a fire in our cellar and refusing to go down and put it out because that would be unpleasant and we would get temporarily dirty. But that unattended fire will soon find it way to our bedroom and living room and our whole house.
So denial and avoidance are not the solution.

Some guidelines for proceeding would be:

1. If you are going to work with your childhood experiences or any other intense emotions and especially depression, you should have an experienced guide for this work. Someone whom you trust and have access to if you need help.

2. Do not do such work immediately before sleeping, driving or important meetings.

3. Thanks to Gary Craig?s work with this, you can work “Hypothetically” and then directly with the charged experience.

A. First without closing your eyes or in any way trying to relive your negative experience, ask yourself, ” IF I were to come into experiential and emotional contact with this memory, how disturbed would I feel?” So here you take an “Hypothetical SUD”.

B. Then employ as many rounds of Hypothetical EFT as you need to get the Hypothetical SUD to 3 or less.

C. Now actually close your eyes and seek to remember the event as vividly as you can and see where your real SUD is and continue to employ EFT on the emotions you have when in direct emotional contact with the event.

D. Continue to work with any other aspects, which might come up.

Our experience is that having worked with the Hypothetical SUD for a number of rounds we have actually collapsed to a great degree the actual energy field. Thus we have an almost painless way of getting from these inner obstacles to health, peace, happiness and success.

If you can find a practitioner experienced TFT, EFT or EMDR, you will be able to get free even more quickly from these emotions.

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