It is now time to discover and analyze your own feelings and thoughts about life and death. The information in this book is useless unless we can begin to employ it in our lives. Answering the following questions will help you to discover what beliefs, addictions, or fears are preventing you from being able to accept your own death or the death of your loved ones. The same obstacles which prevent us from being able to accept death prevent us from being able to accept the flow of life itself. Life is a series of small deaths of all our attachments.Working on understanding these blockages, will help us to live our lives more fully, more happily and more in harmony with our inner values.
QUESTIONNAIRE ON ACCEPTANCE OF DEATH
The following questions will help you to discover, objectify and transcend the various fears, attachments and emotional blockages which cause you to fear death, and, of course, also life itself. Look deeply into yourself for the answers. In freeing yourself from these blockages you will experience more energy, love and joy in life. Let us briefly discuss what we can discover through answering the various questions:
QUESTION I : ATTACHMENTS
1) The attachments which we discover in answering these questions concerning what we will miss when we have to leave, will also help us to understand the major causes of concern, worry, fear, disappointment and anxiety which diminish our happiness now in our daily lives. Every external attachment which we believe we must have in order to feel secure, content or happy becomes a ball and chain around our mind which does not let us really enjoy life. We live in the constant anxiety of how to obtain that which we believe we must have. And even when we obtain it, we live in constant fear of losing it.
2) & 3) CHANGES The questions about the changes we would like to make in our character help us to understand the steps we may want to make in our behavior so as to feel greater inner harmony and continue our spiritual evolution. The basic purpose of life is the continual refinement of the character, so that we become more wise, loving, less egotistical and ever more an instrument of the Divine Will. By answering these questions, we can consciously decide what work we need to do on ourselves while living. Thus we begin to see that facing death really prepares us for life.
1) Imagine that you are now leaving your physical body (dying) and will never return to this particular body or personality. Please list the things you will miss and would not like to leave at this moment. Examine each of the following levels:
a) Material possessions and wealth.
b) Land, buildings etc.
c) Pleasures such as food, sleep, sex, movies, i.e. sense stimulation in general.
d) Projects and ambitions, goals.
e) Professional position of work.
f) Relationships with family or friends.
g) Ideas or concepts.
h) Aspects of your personality.
2) Assuming that the only thing you take with you as you leave the body is your character, are there any aspects of your character which you would prefer not to bring with you into the next life. (Consider your various attachments, fears, habits, weaknesses and behavior in general). In other words, what aspects of your character or personality would you like to modify before the analysis and examination of your life which takes place after death.
3) Are there any talents, qualities or abilities which you would like to develop before leaving the physical body?
4) Write your last will and testament expressing what you would like to happen with all that «belongs» to your physical body.
QUESTION II : GOALS
1) We often live our lives without understanding some greater purpose for our existence. We have lost contact with the inner voice which knows why we are here and what we came to do with our lives during our temporary stay on the earth. This knowledge exists in every individual and if he relaxes and gives some time to the investigation of what is really important to him in life, this voice will once again be awakened within him. Then he will not arrive at the end of his life and fear dying because he realizes he has not done with his life what he really wanted to do. We usually live an unconscious life in which, like robots, we fulfill the expectations and recipes of society concerning what the prerequisites for success and happiness are. More and more people everyday are finding that, although they have achieved everything society claims one needs for happiness (i.e. plenty of money, houses, cars and household objects and esteem), they are still discontent and unhappy. So in answering this question be honest, both about the goals you have accepted from society, from your parents and teachers, and also about your secret dreams and desires which you feel deep inside you.
2) & 3) Answering these questions about how you would live differently, if you knew you were going to die in a specific number of years, will help you discover what is really important to you. We often live our lives in a continual compromise with our laziness, habits and weaknesses saying, «well, I will start next year to live as I really believe is right for me». But next year never comes. It always remains in the future and thus we arrive at old age, full of regrets, that we have not lived our lives as we really wanted to. The answers to these questions will be an indication of how we could start living our lives today in order to live according to what is really important to us.
4) Each of us knows within us when we will be leaving this earth plane. We may not guess the right answer, we may even make a mistake of ten or twenty years. This is not important. What is important is that in answering this question, we are forced to face more consciously the fact that we will actually be leaving our bodies in a specific time-period, and that we have everything to gain and nothing to lose in living our lives as we really want to (as long as we do no harm to others).
1) What are your goals and ambitions in life? What would you like to have accomplished before leaving your physical body? Consider your goals on all levels. That is, what will you have to have achieved in order to leave your body peacefully?
2) If you knew for sure that you will leave your body in exactly 10 years, how would you live differently than you do now? Which activities would you increase and which would you decrease?
3) If you knew for sure that you were going to leave your body in exactly two years, how would you live differently than you do now? Which activities would you increase, and which would you decrease?
4) At about what age do you imagine or guess you will leave your physical body? How many years is that from today? (Even if you have no idea – then close your eyes, ask the question and write the first answer which comes to your mind).
QUESTION III : RELATIONSHIPS
1) & 2) There is a great difference between LOVE and ATTACHMENT. We cannot accept the departure of those to whom we are attached. We mourn for ourselves when someone dies. Not for he who has left his physical prison. He is now free from his limitations on the earth plane. He once again experiences his freedom as a spirit. We are still limited in our bodies and minds and have lost something which was important to us. We cry for ourselves. Thus our inability to accept the departure of one close to us is a result of attachment and not of the love we feel for that being. Listing the people who we cannot accept losing physically, helps us to understand what our attachments may be and thus also discover:
a) Which attachments are creating worry and fear in our lives.
b) What beliefs we have about our own insufficiency, weakness or smallness that make us feel that we cannot continue to live happily and meaningfully without that person. We were born alone and shall leave these bodies alone. All the bodies we know are temporary forms taken by spirits which sooner or later will depart from them.
c) Also it is often the same attachments and needs which cause us to «not be able to live without someone» which makes it «difficult to live with him» and thus create conflict. When we need specific behavior from someone, we unconsciously pressure him and create conflict in the relationship. This analysis will help our relationship be more harmonious until we actually do have to part.
3) &4) One of the obstacles to a peaceful death and to the acceptance of our loved one’s departure is that we have not yet worked out a harmonious relationship with them. We are bound emotionally, mentally and psychically to each person toward which we have some negative feelings. This becomes an obstacle to our grow, happiness and health. The bitterness or anger we feel harms us, not the other. We block the flow of energy, love and happiness in our bodies, not theirs. These emotions create illness in our bodies and remain like clouds over our minds and hearts. They bind us to this personal prison. At some point we will have to forgive and love in order to continue evolving spiritually and simply to have peace of mind. One important process in preparing for death, and for life, is to forgive EVERYONE for anything they may ever have done. When we are free from negativity, we need be further tested by life in order to learn the spiritual lesson of loving without conditions.
1) Is there anyone in your life whose departure from his physical body you could not accept at this moment? Who? List all you can think of.
2) Why do you feel that you cannot accept the departure of the above spirits from their physical bodies? What is it that their bodies, personalities or presence offer you that you would miss if they were no longer physically incarnated? Analyze each case individually. Remember, the question is: What are you receiving from that relationship which you will miss upon the departure of that spirit.
3) Are there any relationships in your life which you feel are not yet resolved harmoniously; which need more work and communication so that you would feel more peaceful about leaving your physical body; or more peaceful about their departure from their physical body? Please list each relationship, and how you would like to improve it.
4) How will you go about harmonizing your relationships with these people? (i.e. verbal communication, letter writing, positive thought projection).
5) Write now a letter to each person you mentioned above, expressing your thoughts to him or her. Express your positive and negative feelings. Forgive and ask forgiveness. In order to be more deeply to the point, imagine that you are about to die in twenty minutes and that this your last communication with that person.
QUESTION IV : FEARS
1) & 2) & 3) These questions are in a way a summary of all the earlier ones. Here we can now make decisions concerning what we must do in order to prepare ourselves so as to be able to face both life and death fearlessly and thus more happily and harmoniously. Every Fear is an obstacle to growth, happiness, health and harmony. All fear is based on our ignorance of our spiritual nature. Fear results from the belief that we are these bodies and these personalities. The effort to overcome fear thus becomes an effort of spiritual development in which the individual grows in greater self-confidence, inner peace, love and self-knowledge. A person who faces and overcomes his fears becomes a truly free man who is able to enjoy life an really live life fully.
1) What do you fear most about leaving your physical body? List whatever fears come to your mind.
2) How do you think you could most efficiently prepare so as to feel ready to leave your physical body at whatever moment that experience may come. Please explain in details.
3) How do you think you could most efficiently prepare so as to accept the departure of your loved ones from their bodies, whenever that may happen? Please explain in details.
May you be forever
happy and in the Light